Protected: Slinking back with my tail between my legs…

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I was abducted…I swear!

Soooooo, yeah.   I haven’t posted in well over a month.  I’d like to have some amazing excuse but the truth is B got the promotion at work and I became obsessed with watching all the seasons of Walking Dead and that leaves no time for anything else.


I feel like I haven’t seen B in the last 6 weeks except to hand him Hazy as he walks in the door and I walk out.  He has been stressed to the max jumping head first into this new job and trying to figure out what this new position is.  Nobody knows because no one has ever filled it before.  It’s also at the worst time of year because Thanksgiving is their biggest holiday and their most stressful time of the year anyway.  We have barely been treading water here.  The hardest part is just feeling like the two of us are not connecting at all.  We literally haven’t had sex in a month and even though I’ve made an effort to get babysitters and gone on a few dates we are both so tired we can barely make small talk.  It bums me out.  We are starting to get our friends teenage daughter to babysit on a regular basis about once a week so B can stay late at work and squeeze in some extra needed hrs there and not worry about rushing home to take Hazy from me so I can go to work.  I am not excited about paying someone to watch her but I trust this girl and if it helps to make things less stressful then I’ll try it.


I had several very busy weekends in a row too which didn’t help us recuperate from our busy weeks.  I had to do two different Pilates workshops (6 hr total) to get my required CECs to keep my certification up to date and current.  I also had to go two different dance performances which of course was fun for me but a burden on B who had to stay home all of those nights watching Hazy.  I normally wouldn’t feel bad or guilty about getting all that time to do “my thing” but because all he is doing is work related things right now he is not getting any of “B time” which is adding to his stress and depression.  Ugh.   I did try getting babysitters for Hazy so we could at least duck out to lunch together but like I said before it was too brief and we are too tired to really cut loose and have fun.  I’m hoping after the holidays we can get more into a groove and focus on “us time”  a little bit more.  I feel like that’s important before we start talking about trying for #2…


Let talk about sweet miss Haze for a minute.  She’s gigantic!  Not really, she’s relatively still a tiny little dynamo but she was in the 40th percentile for weight last week at her 15 month appt (two weeks late, she’s 16 months at the end of the month)!!!!  Remember at her 6 month appt she was in the 1st percentile so I am astounded!  She also has grown 2 inches since the middle of August bumping her up to the 25th percentile for height!  Crazy, right?  She has amazing mobility and dexterity and has at least 50 words.  She is uber confident in her usual environments, one might even say cocky…I think my biggest fear as a mom so far is if I’m balancing my peaceful parenting/attachment parenting style with my “I reeeeeaaaaalllly don’t want my kid to be an obnoxious brat” concerns effectively.  It’s so hard to find that line where helping her take care of and solve her every physical and emotional discomfort boarders on over indulging her and making her the center of attention in every scenario.  This is definitely a kid who needs to have a sibling and not be the only child in our family.  It will help immensely when my sister gets pregnant and she has a cousin to share the limelight.  That’s another story…


Hazy has been healthy as a horse from the day she was born, pretty much until this weekend…she caught some weird stomach bug and projectile vomited at my friend’s daughter’s birthday party all over my friend who was holding her.  It also was all over the floor and then when she had a repeat performance it was all over me.  Then when we quickly left the party and drove home she threw up all over herself (again) and her carseat.  Got her home and she acted totally normal.  24 hrs goes by with no vomiting and we get into bed last night and right in the middle of probably the cutest dad and baby cuddling/lullaby singing session ever in the history of the world, she rolls over and projectile vomits ALL over the clean sheets and herself including her freshly shampooed hair (and my freshly shampooed hair).   Today is the first sick day I’ve taken since well before I was pregnant, excluding my maternity leave of course.  I don’t know if she will be fine all day only to puke again tonight or if we are over it now….either way I was too paranoid about her puking on me in public if we didn’t stay home!

Here’s a bunch of pics to make up for my hiatus….


Hazy on Halloween in her fish costume I made her!


I was the fishing net…



The back of her costume…I loosely based it off the Rainbow Fish so that’s why there’s one shiny scale.



Hazy and B out front of our house, he was supposed to be a fisherman but bc of the job he never had time to get a costume together.



Random pic in Hazy’s room



Swinging at the park is still her favorite! Check out those pony tails!!



Hazy and one of my nanny girls…notice their matching shoes, too cute!! They just love each other!



Random photo of her sleeping and playing music